Being tired just makes everything seem worse. Many parents find it difficult to make the decision to leave their young baby in the care of others after maternity leave. Choose your childcare carefully. Or you wonder whether your baby isn’t getting enough one-on-one attention at daycare, or you feel like you can’t be honest or direct with your mother-in-law. It’s easy to feel depressed about going back to work after maternity leave. You’ve been on maternity leave for 26 weeks or less. Going back to work after maternity leave can be a daunting and emotional experience. I had survived the newborn stage, managed to fit into my old clothes (more or less), and was finally getting a hang of this parenting thing after months of adjusting to motherhood. Maternity leave has given you weeks of bonding time with your newborn. The educational health content on What To Expect is reviewed by our medical review board and team of experts to be up-to-date and in line with the latest evidence-based medical information and accepted health guidelines, including the medically reviewed What to Expect books by Heidi Murkoff. This is even more important those first few weeks you’re back at work. How to cope: Fortunately, not all emotions you’ll experience are painful. And that, in turn, might make you feel guilty. s.setAttribute('id','_ck_347973_XX');document.head.appendChild(s) If you’re not able to care for yourself and if you’re not fully there emotionally because of all the stress and to-dos, your baby will be affected. It’s a good idea to agree with your employer before you go on maternity leave how you’re going to take your holiday. How to cope: You were a woman before you became a mother, and being back at work allows you to — well, maybe at least some of the time — take some pleasure in that. Shortly I will be heading back to the daily grind of full time office life as my second, and likely last, stint of maternity leave comes to an end. And while you know you’re making a better life for him by working, all these emotions still get hard. part of you is excited to get back to work. I’m also new to this whole working mom thing, and to being a mom in general. TheBump.com makes the transition back to work after maternity leave easier with these tips. I strutted around the house in my kitten heels, anxious, as I debated on whether I indeed wanted to go back to work. Kids don’t keep tabs. But there are other factors at play, too. You’re settling in, figuring out what has changed, and getting used to your new daily routine. You need to be comfortable with your childcare situation. Of course, there are still plenty of bad days, but now the good ones are just as prevalent. It is ok to be both sad to leave your baby but also happy to get back to your desk. Learning to enjoy the good emotions (and not feel guilty or ashamed about them) can help you tolerate the bad ones. How is your relationship with this person (or people)? Remember, there is no such thing as a perfect mother. Which means that many working mothers are faced with very little choice when it comes to going back to work; they simply can’t afford to be a stay-at-home mom.However, there are plenty of mothers who choose to go back to work for other reasons: they love their jobs, they love their coworkers, and they love contributing to their family finances. There's a difference, though, between normal wistfulness and full-on … Returning to Work After Maternity Leave: 10 Ways to Make It as Painless as Possible. I feel really sad now thinking about it, but I know from DC1 that after a week or so the worst will be over and I'll be back in the swing of things. I've been on leave for 2 1/2 months and am going back in 2 weeks. Going back to work is a hard adjustment because you haven’t been at work for months, you’re sleep-deprived, and the morning routine can feel stressful. Excerpted from Working Mom Survival Guide; a Working Mother Magazine book, ©Weldon Owen Inc. Going back to work after maternity leave should be an easy transition but when things don’t go to plan it’s important to have set a plan for those days. You’ll find gentle reminders to keep you going, as well as encouragement to look at the hard truth about your circumstances if you truly want things to change: Like many working moms, you’re likely going back to work when your baby is still an infant. If you find yourself wishing you were back with your baby instead of at work, take a look at these insights that will cheer you up. For more information, contact us or call us today at 561-496-1094. Jenner’s sister, Khloe Kardashian, also expressed concerns about the end of maternity leave after the birth of her daughter, True. With your baby so used to being with you all day, you can’t imagine what a big change going back to work will be for the both of you. Feeling depressed about going back to work after maternity leave is all too common. What To Expect’s Postpartum Depression Group, 5 Common Working Mom Guilt Trips and How to Cope, reviewed by our medical review board and team of experts. There was a part of me excited to get back to work to be outside the 'nest,' but when I was there, I felt I should be and wanted to be at home with my babies. It’s absolutely normal and natural to feel a whirlwind of worries when it comes to returning to work after maternity leave. That’s exactly how I felt going back to work after my first maternity leave. Working outside the home doesn't make you a bad mother — in fact, studies have not found that children experience any harm when their mothers work outside the home. Leaving their child with daycare, or even … There's no two ways about it: returning to work after a break isn't easy. They won’t love you less because you’re home at six instead of at three. The most obvious reason: You don’t want to be away from your brand new baby. With so much unknown, I wanted to put together the steps that would help me get to the office, make it through the day, and transition back home without missing or forgetting anything. Returning to work after giving birth, or — if you're one of the lucky ones — after maternity leave, can be an emotionally jarring experience. The first week back at work can be hugely overwhelming and stressful. Feeling depressed about going back to work after maternity leave is all too common. document.addEventListener('scroll',function(){if(window.scrollY>244)loadFc()}). Health information on this site is based on peer-reviewed medical journals and highly respected health organizations and institutions including ACOG (American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists), CDC (Centers for Disease Control and Prevention) and AAP (American Academy of Pediatrics), as well as the What to Expect books by Heidi Murkoff. You don’t want to leave the baby with strangers, worried that he’ll be scared in his new environment. So whenever you feel those feelings of guilt start to creep in, remind yourself: You’re not just helping yourself, you’re helping your baby. As a new mother you can never completely eliminate the guilt. Every situation has its pros and cons, and going back to work is no different. After all, you may be wondering (and worrying!) The flood of emotions — often conflicting ones — can be downright staggering. The adjustment can be rough for everyone, but thankfully, not permanent. Uncertainty is also a common emotion at this point, especially about how often is appropriate to check in with your caregiver or how much you should be pumping. It’s even worse when you’re miserable at work. And just as crazy of an adjustment that was, the first few days back to work will also have its own set of challenges. It's really nice your DS will be with your mum - DC1 was at bike with DH for the first couple of months and it made my transition back to work … Don’t forget: Join my newsletter and take a look at the 5 key mistakes to avoid: Your email address will not be published. Many new mothers also realize that they miss the intellectual stimulus and … I felt like not returning to work after maternity leave. Start preparing now to help him adjust to your new schedule. Having a baby is in itself a challenge. “Do not warm the milk in the microwave.” I told Jane, my house help, for the umpteenth time. I have skills in my sector (Marketing) and I'm sure I could find another job if I had to. Then, when you are apart, you can happily reminisce over the memories you have of your time together, which can help you feel better. Money, drinks, adult stuff. Plan a reward that will help you get through the first week back at work. The relief of knowing baby is okay when you’re apart, and that your relationship stays the same. Whatever you are feeling, be patient and kind to yourself during this difficult transition. Remember how annoying it was not to have internet access just yet, or figuring out where to place your kitchen equipment? The best way to cope? This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. who else feels the same? Many new mothers find it hard to settle back to work after their maternity leave has ended. Heading back to work after having a baby is yet another struggle. Are you going back to work after having a baby? Here are some of the changes you could experience when going back to work, and tips to make them easier. But then… it was time to face the first day back at work after maternity leave. It’s easy to assume that everything’s going to be back to normal when you return to work after maternity leave. Today I am honored to share the personal struggle of a brave mama who took the Mindful Return course and made it through both PPD and the return to work. Second, don’t underestimate the havoc that sleep deprivation can wreak on your mental state. I have a good job which I am good at. Let’s say you came home from your first day at work miserable. Join my newsletter and download this amazing resource below—at no cost to you: fcInited=!1; You’re returning to work after maternity leave, and you've got all the logistics in place: childcare, backup childcare, coordinating schedules with your partner, a plan for pumping breast milk. The only problem was, I didn’t know what I didn’t know. Use of this site is subject to our terms of use and privacy policy. Start back on a Thursday if you can swing it. It probably won’t be easy, but you can alleviate some of the stress with careful planning. If you were miserable with your work to begin with, leaving the baby will be less bearable compared to going back to work you enjoy. Here’s how to cope with the roller coaster of emotions you may experience along the way: During the last few weeks of your maternity leave you may experience anticipatory anxiety about going back to work — which is completely understandable. Wishing they could get a break from the kids or reminiscing about getting dressed and talking to adults. And sometimes it just might even be a much-needed break. Going back to work after maternity leave can be a positive change in your life—more than just finally fitting into your old clothes or getting a hang of this parenting thing. While I welcomed time alone, I wasn’t exactly excited about working, either. The most obvious one is earning money, which frees you from the stressful situation of not having much of it. I am debating whether to return to work or become a SAHP. If you’re struggling with putting your baby to sleep, you can teach him to self soothe and sleep on his own! If you have concerns about maternity leave and going back to work after baby or if you are suffering from the symptoms of postpartum depression, the therapists at The Center for Treatment of Anxiety and Mood Disorders in Delray Beach, Florida are there to help. We of all people should know that after having a baby. But now that you feet are more firmly planted in your new life and you are used to the new routine, you may also start to realize you need things for yourself to make the day run more smoothly. Caroline Morvan, Internal Communications Manager, explains that new parents should look into childcare that works for them before starting work as it can be difficult to organise. take a look at the 5 key mistakes to avoid. var s=document.createElement('script');s.async=true;s.onload=function(){};s.src='//forms.convertkit.com/347973?v=6'; Matt, 24, who recently took a week off his job in administration due to mental health issues, advises anyone in a similar position to him to … The scars of returning to work after maternity leave are pretty fresh for me and I’m still struggling with the transition. Let’s not forget that you’re able to hang out with other people and have real adult conversation and that work is (usually) easier than raising kids. You dread the stress of dropping him off at daycare and making it on time to work. A mom’s responsibility for the baby, the household and her work duties upon returning from maternity leave could affect her risk of developing postpartum depression. While you may only see the cons right now, remind yourself you have many benefits other moms would envy. If possible, do a test run with your child’s caregiver or daycare before the first “official” day. It just means you have something that makes you feel good about yourself — what a great example for your little one! Wanting to make money and a contribution to something else besides kids. When I went back to work, I packed my lunch, chose my clothes and made sure I didn’t forget my pump parts—all the night before. Here’s your pep talk and action plan to get through these challenging days. Or how about when you moved into your home? That’s okay: All big transitions take some adjustment. Tips for Going Back to Work After Maternity Leave Ease Back into Work If you can, try going to work for a day or two the first week before slowly transitioning to full time. I hear you. Not only has your life changed drastically, especially if you are returning to work after your first baby, but there are a lot of other things at play than can cause anxiety in the lead up to going back to work. I was sad to leave my daughter and mourning the end of that new phase of our life together. When You’re Depressed About Going Back to Work After Maternity Leave. Prepare, prepare, prepare, especially the night before. You may experience separation anxiety from being away from your baby after so much time together, and, of course, working mom guilt — feeling inadequate and unable to measure up, at home or at work. It costs a lot of money to have a baby. about what you’re returning to: Your role could have shifted or … Our daughter, whom we lovingly refer to as Peachy, turned 8 months old this week. favorite Maya Angelou quotes goes like this: How to Work from Home with a Baby (And Actually Get Things Done), What You Need to Do when You’re Stressed about Money. Don’t be surprised if a small (or big!) Do you trust their capabilities? During the last few weeks of your maternity leave you may experience anticipatory anxiety about going back to work — which is completely understandable. I promise it gets better. I know it’s easy to forget all this when you miss your baby, but constantly reminding yourself why you’re here can make the work days go smoother. You even find yourself crying and feeling horrible, like you’re handing him off to someone else to raise. Required fields are marked *. © 2020 Everyday Health, Inc. 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